About a month ago the motivations, the willingness I had for such a
programme and a month in Tranas was super high. The weather was nice and
sunny, summer was not yet over and one could easily dream about far and
away places, picturesque landscapes by the lake and so on. [Even though I
came across the Syrian and Iraqi refugees at the gates of the Swedish
Consulate, before my appointment for the visa application, I tried not to break down.] Today
though it's hard to think and write a few words (October 10th is
the day that we witnessed the twin blasts of a peace rally) cause I
spent the whole day either by going to the funerals of people I have
never met or by mourning for the lives of many that has passed by. And
for all that while I was online, trying to keep track of the news and they were
not good. The worse part is I was doing the same thing just a few days
ago, because of the curfew in Cizre that lasted for more than 9 days and
again that kept us craving for more news, some human reflex. Now I feel
like some bulldozer ran over me, I'm not sure if I can concentrate on
something, hear my own thoughts or have a bit of a peace of mind... May
be at least this could be the only expectation I have about the
residency programme, some peace and quiet and a bit of a distance from
it all.
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